扬帆 | 英华学子优秀课程作品展 (六)

发布时间:2022-09-05 13:31:54

历经10余年英语专业人文化教学改革,英语学院建构了丰富完善的课程体系,五大学科方向课程齐全,核心课程、实践课程近30门,专业方向课程60余门。此外,学院陆续创办英华辩论队、英华诗苑、英华演讲社、英华写作工作坊、英华口译社、英华笔译社六个学术类社团,成为学院育人体系中重要的一环。本栏目将展示英院学子在各门课程以及学术社团中的优秀习作和论文,“浩渺行无极,扬帆但信风”,英语学院愿为学子们“扬帆”,护送学子们驶向更广阔的天地。

扬帆 · 第六期

去年年底,英华笔译社为纪念鲁迅先生诞辰140周年,重译了中国第一部现代白话小说《狂人日记》。

       该次活动为笔译社建社以来第一次动员全社的文学翻译活动,在社员中引起了极大的积极反响。经过一轮初译、二轮初审、指导教师三轮终审后,译文质量取得了极大的提升。

       基于精益求精的原则,今年5月我们再次对之前的译文进行修改或重译,最终汇总各自翻译的部分进行组内互校,并在指导老师们的耐心修订与指导下进一步提高翻译质量,社员们收获颇丰。文末有译者的心声,接下来就让我们一起听听吧!

——英华笔译社

习作1

狂人日记

The Diary of a Madman

鲁迅

Lu Xun

Four

译者:张婕雅 李子禾 童曦 黄雨虹 靳舒婕

早上,我静坐了一会儿。陈老五送进饭来,一碗菜,一碗蒸鱼;这鱼的眼睛,白而且硬,张着嘴,同那一伙想吃人的人一样。吃了几筷,滑溜溜的不知是鱼是人,便把他兜肚连肠的吐出。

In the morning, I sat quietly for a while. Old Chen brought in some food – a bowl of vegetables, and a bowl of steamed fish. The eyes of the fish were white and glassy, and its mouth was wide open, just like the human-eaters in the village After a few mouthfuls I was confused about whether the slippery thing I was chewing was fish or human flesh. I threw it up, all of it.

我说,“老五,对大哥说,我闷得慌,想到园里走走。” 老五不答应,走了;停一会,可就来开了门。

I requested, “Chen, please tell my brother it is too stifled indoors. I want to go for a walk in the garden.”  Chen left without saying anything; shortly afterwards he came back and unlocked the door.

我也不动,研究他们如何摆布我;知道他们一定不肯放松。果然!我大哥引了一个老头子,慢慢走来;他满眼凶光,怕我看出,只是低头向着地,从眼镜横边暗暗看我。大哥说,“今天你仿佛很好。” 我说“是的。” 大哥说,“今天请何先生来,给你诊一诊。” 我说,“可以!” 其实我岂不知道这老头子是刽子手扮的!无非借了看脉这名目,揣一揣肥瘠:因这功劳,也分一片肉吃。我也不怕;虽然不吃人,胆子却比他们还壮。伸出两个拳头,看他如何下手。老头子坐着,闭了眼睛,摸了好一会,呆了好一会;便张开他鬼眼睛说,“不要乱想。静静的养几天,就好了。”

I did not move a bit. I wanted to see what they would do to me. I was certain that they would never let me go. Within my expectation, my brother led an old man in, both walking slowly towards me. The old man kept his head down to the ground, casting some glances at me from the side of his spectacles for fear that I could notice the murderous glares in his eyes. “You seem well today,” said my brother. “Yes,” I replied. “This is Doctor He,” he said, “I have invited him to examine you.” “Be my guest!” I said. But how could I have no idea that the old man was actually an executioner in disguise! He came here for nothing but check how fat I was in the  pretext of feeling my pulse. Because of this, he could also have a share of my flesh. I was not afraid at all. Although I didn’t eat human flesh, I had even greater courage than the like of him. I held out two fists to see how he would treat me. The old man sat down, closed his eyes,  felt my pulse for a while and remained still for some time. After that, he opened his terrifying eyes and warned, “Don’t let your imagination run wild. Take a good rest in peace for a few days, and you will  be fine”

不要乱想,静静的养!养肥了,他们是自然可以多吃;我有什么好处,怎么会“好了”?他们这群人,又想吃人,又是鬼鬼祟祟,想法子遮掩,不敢直截下手,真要令我笑死。我忍不住,便放声大笑起来,十分快活。自己晓得这笑声里面,有的是义勇和正气。老头子和大哥,都失了色,被我这勇气正气镇压住了。

Don't let my imagination run wild and take a good rest in peace! If I keep on getting fat, they will in return have more flesh to eat. How can I be "fine" when there is no benefit for me at all? This bunch of people wanted to eat human flesh, but were too sneaky to do so directly. How ridiculous! I couldn't help bursting into laughter, in/out of which righteousness and courage could be sensed without a doubt. The old man and my brother, both losing their color, were subdued by my courageousness and righteousness.

但是我有勇气,他们便越想吃我,沾光一点这勇气。老头子跨出门,走不多远,便低声对大哥说道,“赶紧吃罢!”大哥点点头。原来也有你!这一件大发见,虽似意外,也在意中:合伙吃我的人,便是我的哥哥!

But just because I was brave, they were more eager to eat me, wanting to get in on eating my flesh to acquire a sense of achievement. The old man went out of the gate, and before going far, he said to my brother in a low voice, “Eat as soon as possible/immediately!” And my brother nodded! YOU are in it too!  This discovery, though stunned me a bit, is not so beyond my expectation: the accomplice in eating me is my elder brother!

吃人的是我哥哥!

The man eating human flesh is my own brother!

我是吃人的人的兄弟!

I am the brother of an eater of human flesh!

我自己被人吃了,可仍然是吃人的人的兄弟!

I am destined to be eaten myself; But I’m still the brother of an eater of human flesh!

习作2

Five

译者:孔文君 陶新智 伊延帅 高佳晖 赵咏孜 孙雪

这几天是退一步想:假使那老头子不是刽子手扮的,真是医生,也仍然是吃人的人。他们的祖师李时珍做的“本草什么”上,明明写着人肉可以煎吃;他还能说自己不吃人么?

These days I have been thinking about some of my earlier suspicions: even if the old man were a real doctor instead of an executioner in disguise, he might as well be a human-eater all the same. In that Book of … Herbs? … written by their predecessor Li Shizhen,[1] it is clearly stated that boiled human flesh is perfectly edible. How could he deny his habit of eating people?

至于我家大哥,也毫不冤枉他。他对我讲书的时候,亲口说过可以“易子而食”;又一回偶然议论起一个不好的人,他便说不但该杀,还当“食肉寝皮”。我那时年纪还小,心跳了好半天。前天狼子村佃户来说吃心肝的事,他也毫不奇怪,不住的点头。可见心思是同从前一样狠。既然可以“易子而食”,便什么都易得,什么人都吃得。我从前单听他讲道理,也胡涂过去;现在晓得他讲道理的时候,不但唇边还抹着人油,而且心里满装着吃人的意思。

As for my brother, I also had a good reason to suspect him. When telling me stories, he once mentioned that “people could exchange their children to eat” when facing extreme famines. Another time, when discussing a bad guy, my brother said that this person deserved to be killed, “with his fresh reduced to food and his hide to blanket”. I was young back then and my heart beat fast for a long time. He was not surprised by the story that the tenants from Wolf Cub Village had eaten a man’s heart and liver the other day, but kept nodding his head with approval. It could be seen that he was as cruel as before. If children can be exchanged for eating, no wonder all could get exchanged and eaten. I used to be fooled by his reasoning and blindly let it go. Now I understood that he was talking with human grease on his lips, and wholeheartedly, thinking of eating humans.

[1] Li Shizhen (1518-1593): A famous Chinese acupuncturist, herbalist, naturalist, pharmacologist, physician, and writer of the Ming dynasty. He is the author of The Compendium of Materia Medica (Bencao Gangmu [本草纲目], which is exactly “the Book” mentioned by the madman. (注意:圆括号内不能再套圆括号;改用方括号)

习作3

Six

译者:孔文君 陶新智 伊延帅 高佳晖 赵咏孜 孙雪

黑漆漆的,不知是日是夜。赵家的狗又叫起来了。

So dark! It is hard to tell day from night., But hear hear, the dog of the Zhaos’ is barking again.

狮子似的凶心,兔子的怯弱,狐狸的狡猾,……

Brutal as lions; cowardly as rabbits; cunning as foxes…

习作4

Seven

译者:孔文君 陶新智 伊延帅 高佳晖 赵咏孜 孙雪

我晓得他们的方法,直捷杀了,是不肯的,而且也不敢,怕有祸祟。所以他们大家连络,布满了罗网,逼我自戕。试看前几天街上男女的样子,和这几天我大哥的作为,便足可悟出八九分了。最好是解下腰带,挂在梁上,自己紧紧勒死;他们没有杀人的罪名,又偿了心愿,自然都欢天喜地的发出一种呜呜咽咽的笑声。否则惊吓忧愁死了,虽则略瘦,也还可以首肯几下。

I know their plans. They are neither willing nor brave enough to kill me openly, for fear of inviting trouble. Instead, they collude with each other and set all kinds of traps to force me to commit suicide. According to how the people on the street acted and what my brother did to me these days, I have become rather clear about their intention. They long for my loosening the belt and tying it above a beam to hang myself. In this way, they can achieve their goal without being accused of murder. This will absolutely evoke out of them a whimpering smirk. By contrast, I would always pine away if I should die from scare and anxiety. They would make do with it and still satisfy themselves, though my corpse would have less flesh on it.

他们是只会吃死肉的!——记得什么书上说,有一种东西,叫“海乙那”的,眼光和样子都很难看;时常吃死肉,连极大的骨头,都细细嚼烂,咽下肚子去,想起来也教人害怕。“海乙那”是狼的亲眷,狼是狗的本家。前天赵家的狗,看我几眼,可见他也同谋,早已接洽。老头子眼看着地,岂能瞒得过我。

They only eat dead flesh! I remember reading in some books about an ugly beast called “hyena”, with terrifying eyes and an inclination for dead meat. It even chews up some enormous bones carefully and swallows them. It is frightening merely to think about that. Hyenas are relatives of wolves, and wolves share the same ancestor with dogs. The Zhaos’ dog looked at me several times the other day, hence it must have already engaged in the conspiracy and become one of the accomplices. The old man also gazed down at the ground in his previous visit. In no way could he fool me!

最可怜的是我的大哥,他也是人,何以毫不害怕;而且合伙吃我呢?还是历来惯了,不以为非呢?还是丧了良心,明知故犯呢?

My brother was the most pathetic one. He is a human himself. How could he be so cold-blooded, and even dare to conspire to eat me? Or was it already habitual enough for him to take it for granted? Or did he lose his conscience and commit crimes on purpose?

我诅咒吃人的人,先从他起头;要劝转吃人的人,也先从他下手。  

I curse all human-eaters, starting with my brother; if I attempt to dissuade human-eaters, I shall start with him too.

习作5

Eight

译者:于敏 倪亦淇 肖冬连 陈诗凡 李如阳 周雨虹

其实这种道理,到了现在,他们也该早已懂得,……

Actually, they should have seen the reason against human-eating a long time ago…

忽然来了一个人;年纪不过二十左右,相貌是不很看得清楚,满面笑容,对了我点头,他的笑也不像真笑。我便问他,“吃人的事,对么?”他仍然笑着说,“不是荒年,怎么会吃人。”我立刻就晓得,他也是一伙,喜欢吃人的;便自勇气百倍,偏要问他。

Suddenly, a man showed up, only about twenty years old. His features were a blur in the darkness. He nodded to me with a broad smile–not so genuine, to be honest. “Is it right about eating human flesh?” I asked him.“This is no famine year. No one eats human flesh.” he said, his smile lingering. I realized immediately that he was one of them and fond of eating humans, too. I mustered up the courage, deciding to confront him anyway.

“对么?”

“But is it right?”

“这等事问他什么。你真会……说笑话。……今天天气很好。”

“Why do you ask? You are so…funny. …It is a good day today.”

天气是好,月色也很亮了。可是我要问你,“对么?”

Yes, the weather is fine indeed. The moon is very bright too. But still, I am not going to let you go. “Is it right?”

他不以为然了。含含胡胡的答道,“不……”

He answered with ambiguity, “No...”, his voice beginning to sound vexed.

“不对?他们何以竟吃?!”

“No? Then why are they eating humans?!”

“没有的事……”

“It’s nonsense.”

“没有的事?狼子村现吃;还有书上都写着,通红斩新!”

“Nonsense? Aren’t people in Wolf Cub Village eating each other? Can’t you see it is written all over in the books? In fresh red ink!”

他便变了脸,铁一般青。睁着眼说,“有许有的,这是从来如此……”

The colour drained from his face and turned into ghostly pale. Eyes widening, he stated, “Human-eating possibly exists, and it has always been like that...”

“从来如此,便对么?”

“Is it right simply because it has always been like that?”

“我不同你讲这些道理;总之你不该说,你说便是你错!”

“I am not supposed to discuss any of these with you; anyway, you should not talk about  it—whoever talks about it is in the wrong!”

我直跳起来,张开眼,这人便不见了。全身出了一大片汗。他的年纪,比我大哥小得远,居然也是一伙;这一定是他娘老子先教的。还怕已经教给他儿子了;所以连小孩子,也都恶狠狠的看我。

I leaped up and opened my eyes, but the man had vanished. Perspiration soaked me from top to toe. He was much younger than my brother, but he was also one of them; he must have been taught this by his parents. I am also afraid that he must have already passed it onto his sons: that’s possibly why even the children stare at me fiercely.

习作6

Nine

译者:于敏 倪亦淇 肖冬连 陈诗凡 李如阳 周雨虹

自己想吃人,又怕被别人吃了,都用着疑心极深的眼光,面面相觑。……

Thinking of eating humans while worrying about being eaten, they eye each other with deepest suspicion and fear...

去了这心思,放心做事走路吃饭睡觉,何等舒服。这只是一条门槛,一个关头。他们可是父子兄弟夫妇朋友师生仇敌和各不相识的人,都结成一伙,互相劝勉,互相牵掣,死也不肯跨过这一步。

If they would get rid of the idea, they could lead a life of ease: working, commuting, eating and sleeping, totally relieved. The thought is the last threshold to cross or the last obstacle to overcome. However, fathers and sons, brothers, husbands and wives, friends, teachers and students, enemies as well as total strangers--they all collude to pull each other back in stepping across this threshold.

社员 · 心得

伊延帅:在曹思宇老师的指导下对《狂人日记》进行重译后,我认识到了从事文学翻译对译者的严苛要求。要想翻译出合格的作品,既要对原文本中每个词、每句话有充分理解,并将其组织成一个整体,从而选择译文的语言风格同时也要对目标语言有着深刻认识,对于所用词汇的本义和引申义都要有十足的把握。除了语言能力方面,我还认识到了一位优秀的译者应该以怎样的态度对待翻译。在重译过程中,曹老师孜孜不倦的指导也让我印象深刻,大到文学作品的创作背景,小到文中某个标点符号的使用,曹老师都以十分严谨的态度进行对待。

张婕雅:在《狂人日记》翻译任务中,我负责的文本里有一个词——“鬼眼睛”( terrifying eyes )。起初我对“鬼”一字的理解是密谋/欺骗/鬼鬼祟祟等神态,所以选择了shifty一词。但是经过曹思宇老师点拨,我明白了对“鬼”字的理解应该建立在前后文之上。前文提到了老头子的眼睛“满眼凶光”(the murderous glares in his eyes),应该着重强调文中提到的这一凶狠可怖的特征,所以选用terrifying会更贴切。曹老师的指点使我明白了翻译中文文本不能断章取义,割裂地看某个词,而应该结合上下文。特别是像《狂人日记》这类半文半白的文本,更要小心谨慎。

相关推荐 换一组

我要评论 (网友评论仅供其表达个人看法,并不表明本站同意其观点或证实其描述)

全部评论 ( 条)

    英华学子优秀课程作品展 (六)。
    Baidu
    map